Diary, Personal Thoughts, Uncategorized

My Broken Existence

Do you ever wish that you could cease to exist? I’m not referring to suicide.

I never want to harm myself but what if I could erase my existence?

What if I could disappear without a trace, as if I never existed?

I often look at my life and search deep down for a sense of purpose but I find nothing.

I usually  try not to share this because I feel that the immediate reaction is to tell me that I matter.

I try to explain, but no one can really comprehend how I feel.

How could they? If I was not feeling it, I would not understand it either.

I often try to minimize it and I feel guilty when I am not able to effectively conceal my sense of dread.

I am currently in a place of deep exasperation.

I have tried to find a way out and yet I am still stuck.

No matter what I do, I always seem to end up with the same result, disappointment.

So today, I am taking a break.

I’m imagining the possibility of escaping my broken existence.

 

 

 

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